New Beginnings

     Considering all of the changes and new beginnings happening in my life at this moment in time, I thought I would join the 'in-crowd' and become a blogger.  We'll see how it all works out.  

     As for the new beginnings in my life, I just finished nursing school a couple of weeks ago and am starting to actually work as a nurse with some responsibility.  This is a huge undertaking and I am pretty nervous about it.  I wonder if I should feel more confident or is this normal for new nurses fresh out of school? I feel like I just spent two years in school and don't know a darn thing!  The funny thing is I have heard from many people that nursing school teaches you to pass boards, experience teaches you to be a nurse.  I hope this is the case for me because I feel blind going in to work sometimes.  While I love what I do, I swear each day I go in there I find out something else I don't know, or something else I didn't know I was supposed to do.  I imagine it will become somewhat routine after a while.  (At least I hope so!)

     The other things that are constantly changing in my life are my children.  Laynee is fast approaching teenage years and it is showing with her attitude! She has mood swings that scare the crap out of me some days, other days she is just as sweet as can be.  I often wonder what I would do without Laynee because she often fills in as my own personal assistant!  Michael has had a fantastic year so far.  He has started on medication for ADHD and depression and is a whole new boy.  He made the honor roll this past fall and has only been in trouble once this year that required a phone call to me from the principal.  Keira is 4 and going on 25.  She is too smart for her own good and some days I wonder how we all keep up with her.  Darrel is doing the stay home dad thing with her until she starts kindergarten next fall.  After being home with her for only two weeks she is reading 3 letter words and has learned to write her name.  She also does very simple math like 2+3=5 etc...

     I believe children grow way too fast.  I wake up sometimes at night in a panic because I dreamed about them being all grown up.  I wake up with a gripping fear that I missed out on 10 years of their life and missed them growing up for some reason.  I don't like that dream because I am loving every minute of raising them, even the tough times.  Why is it that we learn how to raise children while we are raising them and by the time we have it all figured out they grow up and move away? I often think we are all growing up together instead of just raising our kids.