Today I feel like life is a tornado! There is so much to be done and only 24 short hours in a day. I tend to be a giver. Often friends and family ask for things, and no matter what I have going on I will extend myself to do more than I really should. I am trying very hard to learn to say no because I tend to create way too much stress for myself when I take on so much.
Today I had to take Laynee to the eye doctor to get her glasses replaced. I no sooner got home and my friend called and wanted a ride to Decorah. I have 2 hours free this afternoon so I instantly started trying to think of how I could make it work. The more I thought about it I realized I would really like to have this 2 hours to myself to unwind a little and take a shower and enjoy my daughter a little bit. At 4pm we have my niece's birthday party and are going out with my BFF for her birthday tonight. So I very gently told my friend,"No, I can't take you to Decorah this afternoon. I just have too much going on today." I felt a twinge of guilt immediately after saying this because I feel like I disappointed someone. What is my problem? Why is it so hard to say no? Really this friend can find another ride and take care of herself, I just feel like I let someone down. I hope this feeling passes.
So, how do you disappoint someone without feeling guilty afterward?
I'm replying to say I know exactly how you feel. I've yet to say 'No' without feeling any sort of guilt afterward (unless it is saying no to Cordelia-no guilt there!)
ReplyDeleteAll I know is that it takes practice, thoughtfulness towards yourself, and realizing that you are only setting necessary boundaries so you can live a healthful life in all aspects: emotional, mental, spiritual, and physical.
Oh I am the same way and it is something I am really really really working on. I am working on putting up boundaries, not only for my own sanity/health but for my family's too. I have started saying "No" a lot more lately and really, at first it was HARD and I felt guilty, but the more I've said it, the easier it gets :) And I've also realized that people around me seem to say No to more things than I do ;)
ReplyDeleteLori, I feel the same way! I get told no by people, so I never understand why it's so hard for me to say no. I am going to work very hard on this one because I really need balance in my life.
ReplyDeleteI started on COPD Herbal treatment from Ultimate Life Clinic, the treatment worked incredibly for my lungs condition. I used the herbal treatment for almost 4 months, it reversed my COPD. My severe shortness of breath, dry cough, chest tightness gradually disappeared. Reach Ultimate Life Clinic via their website at www.ultimatelifeclinic.com I can breath much better and It feels comfortable!
ReplyDelete